"A
woman is sixteen times more effectively intelligent and
more sensitive than a man, and she can handle all walks of
intelligence better than any man. Man is given the physical,
and woman is given the intelligence to balance it out."
Yogi Bhajan
Ever
Wondered
how a woman's brain works?
Well, it's finally explained here
in one easy-to-understand flow-chart.
Every little blue ball is a thought
about
something that needs to be done,
a decision to be made,
or a problem that needs solving ... NOW!
FURTHER DISCUSSION IS NOT NEEDED.
Ever
Wondered
how to make a woman happy?
It's
not difficult.
A man only needs to be ...
1.
a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer and massage therapist
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO ...
45.
give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other women
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO ...
51.
give her lots of attention, but expect little in return
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never concerned about where she goes
AND IT IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ...
54.
NEVER, EVER FORGET
birthdays
anniversaries
arrangements
and appointments she makes
and
... to put the toilet seat down
EVER
WONDERED
how to make a man happy?
1.
Show up naked
2. Bring food
But men are just happier people by nature.
What
do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never
be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can
wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas
station restroom because this one is just 'too icky'. You don't
have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same
work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Graying hair adds attraction.
A wedding dress for her, $5000, as opposed to a Tux rental for him
for $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to
them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all
the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know
stuff about tanks and air conditioning.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all
your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are
more than enough. You never have strap problems in public. You are
unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle
lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face
and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually
hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes, and one color
for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife and you don't
need an appointment. One stainless steel wrist watch, and maybe
one ring for all occasions. You have freedom of choice concerning
growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives
on December 24, in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier!
"Fixed the AC myself for a whole lot less."
