My Sikh Sense
Fatehpal Singh Tarney
Why there are so few converts* to Sikhism
 In past years, I have often used the term “Gora Sikh/Sardar” to identify myself. In recent times, I much prefer “Sabat Surat Sardar” or “Pakka Sardar.”
No religion begins without converts and all religions begin as rebellions. However, many people born into a given faith tend to overlook this fact. Converts are often looked upon with some suspicion, or considered inferior devotees. [See Tribalism.] The reverse of this is the idea that converts reinvigorate a religion – new people bring new life to it – new blood.
Religious conversion has been categorized as follows: free choice conversions; death bed conversions; marital conversions; forced conversions, and conversions of convenience, such as greater opportunities for upward mobility. Examples of this were non-Muslims in the Ottoman Empire or under the Mughals in India who adopted Islam, or when parents wanted a child to be admitted to a prestigious Christian school. This was fairly common during The British Raj.
Westerners, however, who develop a keen interest in Sikhism are confronted with something quite unique and challenging. The common view in the West among those few who know anything at all about our religion is that Sikhism is NOT known to actively proselytize, but that it does accept converts. The challenge for the Western convert to Sikhism involves, among other things, language.
My personal experience with Punjabi has combined frustration with some frivolity. I am quite proficient in the Spanish language; less so in Punjabi. However, my pronunciation in both languages has been considered excellent by native speakers. Good pronunciation can be both an asset and a liability in that people fluent in these tongues assume that I too am fluent, and begin speaking too rapidly for me. I use both words and hand gestures to slow both Spanish and Punjabi speakers down!
We do not proselytize as some other religions do, but since 9-11 we have been committed to educating non-Sikhs - especially in the West. In my view, parchar is very important. The great ragi from Australia, Bhai Dya Singh, once visited our south Florida Gurdwara Sahib and said something profound – I never forgot it, “Sikhism is the world's best-kept secret!” I maintain that the world needs Sikhi – Gurbani is an oasis with a spring filled with wonderful water, but thirsty people pass it by.
My wise and dear friend, Sardar Nirmal Singh Ji [Camp New Delhi] suggests that we Sikhs should give up hesitation and turn more proactive in talking about ourselves; our beliefs and faith practices to non-Sikhs in the West. In this way, the good that Sikhi offers becomes more visible for others to learn from and build on for common good. Given that there are far more Western converts to Islam, Buddhism, and various Hindu sects, than to Sikhism, it comes as no surprise that there are so-called “white” adherents of these faiths, whereas Western Sikhs, like me, often get the “But you're a white man!” reaction to my saroop.
Once, at a Sikh owned and operated hotel, a young gori lady working at the front desk – no stranger to Sikhs – began her conversation with me with these very words! After I spent five minutes explaining to her that Sikhism is not a race, ethnicity, or nationality, or language, but a religion whose principles guiding behavior are what are central, she reiterated, “But you're a white man!” I also get from many gora people, “Gee, you don't look like you're from India!”
I have come to the following conclusions regarding neophytes to our faith. They ought be told that Gurbani should be their priority. They do not have to immediately stop cutting their hair. The five kakkars and the turban do not have to be straightaway concerns. Sikh sewadars assisting prospective converts should point out the internal diversity within any Sadh Sangat. Point out to these people, for example, the fellow in Nihang bana with a long kirpan, and say that no newcomer should feel obligated to look like this.
Newcomers should be educated about diet. Yes, many Sikhs are strict vegetarians, but others are omnivores with an emphasis, like me, on carnivore! We should explain why we do not eat halal and employ the jhatka method with the instantaneous killing of an animal, preferably with the single blow of a sword or ax, and that some Sikhs, out of respect for their Hindu friends and relatives, avoid beef.
Khalsa status can be a goal and something evolved to. This does not mean that new Sikhs should be discouraged from adopting the Sikh saroop if they are so inclined to do so. What about our Sri Guru Granth Sahib for the newcomer? I offer the following to fellow Sikhs purely as “food for thought.”
Some years ago, I was very impressed with something a mullah in Egypt said. He made the point that a Western convert to Islam reading a Qur'an in English translation, but reading it with careful thought and devotion was superior in the eyes of God to someone in the Near East mindlessly reading it in Arabic and relying only on memorization based on repetition! Repeating words from holy scriptures is not always a bad thing. As always, Nirmal Singh Ji reminds me that Gurbani commends both Veechaar and Simarnaa, remembrance - both have their uses in learning and living values.
It is not my intention to challenge the use the Punjabi language or Gurmukhi in any way. Once more , my wise and beloved friend, Nirmal Singh Ji, has pointed out the issue of language needs to be examined in a thoughtful manner. No one is trying to disconnect the original language from our Sri Guru Grant Sahib. I also, as a Westerner, appreciate Punjabi as an aid to identity in the Diaspora for youngsters to stay culturally connected with their ancestral roots and receive the message of Gurbani/Kirtan/Katha.
Many a Western convert to Sikhi has lamented the insularity of Punjabi Sikhs in their interaction with non-Punjabi Sikhs [and non-Sikhs] arguing that this prejudice to inconsistent with the message and teachings of Guru Nanak Dev Ji. My own experience as a Western convert to Sikhi is to have seen people marginalized when they should have been embraced. Inclusion – not insularity should be promoted and often it is not. Sikh ignorance of and lack of interest in the ideas and experience of Western converts should be a source of concern given the sad state of affairs in Punjab with drug and alcohol abuse as well as the persecution of Sikhs in the Muslim-dominated countries of Pakistan and Afghanistan.
However, I want to be fair. Through the years, I have been warmly welcomed by so many Sikhs of Punjabi origin. Most people who are Sikhs are such the result of accident of birth, I do not imply that this is insignificant. People born into Sikh families have received a great blessing from God. Those of us who are Western converts have also received a blessing from God, but have been given a different path to the same divine essence. Sadly, there are still some people from my home Sadh Sangat who still treat me as an outsider despite over three decades of involvement there and having been president of the Florida Gurdwara. (See Notes.)
I have written through the years about the limited hospitality guests receive. It has always saddened me to see non-Sikh guests to a Gurdwara Sahib be greeted and recognized by a committee person, but then receive only minimal attention and friendliness from Sangat members. The excuse that language prevents cordial interaction is unconvincing. One does not have to be fluent in English to smile at a guest. A smile is a form of Sewa. Moreover, the infighting that occurs in Sadh Sangats often reaches local media including radio, television, and newspapers. This leaves people with a bad impression of our community.
I have even witnessed verbal abuse and fisticuffs even when there are non-Sikh visitors present at a Diwan. My respected online friend, Sardar Jaidev Singh Ji in America, argues that if we hate, argue, and fight each other, why on Earth would anyone join such a group? (See related Issue.) All religions, however, do have their fair share of infighting. If humans were perfect, we would not need congregations as we would already have achieved union with God.
There are other positive things that counteract the negative. I have said on many occasions that my Christian wife has more Sikh friends than I have. My beloved mother, another devout Christian, worshiped at our Gurdwara Sahib for the last four years of her life and was accepted by so many in our Sadh Sangat. No one ever questioned their regular presence at a Sikh place of worship. My mother, born in Italy, said her prayers in Italian and absorbed our Shabads via the translations projected on big screens. God, of course, is multilingual!
My mother always had trouble keeping a chunni on her head. Caring women helped her with this and I, across the Diwan Hall, would regularly gesture to her to keep her head covered. Eventually, I went online and learned how to tie a hijab for her, which would stay on her head. I purchased several hijabs for her. The wonderful thing is that no one questioned my mother's presence at our Diwans. I was often asked this question only out of pure curiosity, “Is your mother a Muslim? I would reply, “No, she's a Christian!" (Why Don't Sikh Women Tie Turban?)
The reputation of our Langar, especially at Harmandir Sahib, has always impressed people around the world. Serving meals without charge to 50,000 people per day and 100,000 at Gurpurbs is amazing. I have a non-Sikh friend who visited Amritsar and was not only impressed with the Langar itself but with the level of hygiene particularly how plates and utensils were thoroughly cleaned. Yes, one would think that the Langar would be a means of spreading our faith. The Langar is praised by many, but when I look, for example, at the Hindus who walk down the street from their mandir to our Gurdwara Sahib for the Langar, their interest is a free meal. They can get a meal at their temple, but there is a charge. To be fair, and sad to say, many Sikhs come to the Gurdwara just to eat Langar.
Allow me to repeat something I have written about many times before. What are the motivations for non-Sikhs to visit a Gurdwara? I suggest that there are six such motivations with some obvious overlap. 1.) basic curiosity 2.) a person has a Sikh friend 3.) a student in a comparative religion class 4.) a person involved in interfaith programs 5.) a political candidate looking for support 6.) a person with spiritual thirst who may or may not know that Gurbani can quench that thirst. Most significant in my view is the 6th motivation, which we as Sikhs must addross in better fashion.
With the passage of time, established religions tend to develop new denominations and sects. Some of these evolve into completely independent groups, while others remain marginal to the mainstream. In Sikhism, there are groups such as Nihangs, Namdharis, Nirankaris, Sindhi “Sikhs,” and the 3HO [Sikh Dharma International]. Given that the first four groups have their origins in the subcontinent, what is of primary interest here is the 3HO group, which began in the West.
This group was founded by Yogi Bhajan. There is an emphasis on Kundalini yoga and vegetarianism, but a reverence for our Sri Guru Granth Sahib and the five kakkars. They try to spread the teachings of our ten Gurus, our Granth, but also the teachings of Yogi Bhajan. Despite their rhetoric of outreach, they are quite insular and peripheral.
I met Yogi Bhajan over 30 years ago here in south Florida at the home of a devout member of our local Sadh Sangat. He predicted that I would eventually take Amrit, but it was unimportant to him that I was not in his 3HO group. As a Vietnam veteran with many comrades afflicted with drug, alcohol, and tobacco addictions, I know Yogi Bhajan helped many of them. Even those who left Sikhism benefited from his influence. Some former members of this group have joined the mainstream Sikh fold.
I conclude this essay with a specific recommendation. When people express an interest in converting to our faith, stress Sahajdhari gradualism. Point out devout Sahajdharis. Encourage newcomers to join with other Sikhs in all religious and social activities and become active members of Sadh Sangats. Keep Khalsa baptism as a goal.   Source. See More Fatehpal Singh Tarney.
See SikhTribes.com. See Gurdwara Watchdogs. See 'My Sikh Sense' Regarding Nikki Haley.
*Notes
Sat Nam. Fetehpal Singh was president of Florida Gurdwara in 2000, a unanimous choice of two antagonistic factions. At the end, he was given a Siropa from the incoming committee in recognition of his reconciliation efforts.
The word Sahajdhari was known before becoming prominent during the 1880's as a definition of a Hindu or Muslim, or a non-sikh who had a inclination towards Sikhism but had not taken the step to become a full fledged Khalsa or Amritdhari. If a Hindu was interested in become a Sikh as many thousands were during this time then he would first dispense with his Hindu belief and study Gurbani and do the Nitnem prayers. Right from the times of Guru Nanak Dev Ji, the procedure to become a Sikh was to get the Pahul from the Guru and follow the instructions given by the Guru. In 1699, when Guru Gobind Singh Ji changed the traditional method of giving 'Pahul' into 'Khandey di Pahul', he told all the members of the Sangat to adopt this way, if they wish to become part of the new Sangat - Khalsa. Those who followed the instinct of their own mind and ignored this order of the Guru failed to become part of this order.
Sahajdhari Sikh is the one who "practices Sahaj." The word "Sahaj" comes in Sri Guru Granth Sahib a number of times. It is not something that can be practiced. It is a stage that can be achieved by devotedly practicing Vaheguru-Akalpurakh's Naam. However, this differs from someone who is Khalsa as this is the belief, which must be practiced and maintained. "Sahaj" of the word "Sahajdhari" is a Punjabi word, which means 'slow', whereas "dhaari" means to 'adopt'. Therefore, 'Sahajdhari' Sikh means a 'slow adopter' of Sikhism and has no connection whatsoever with the 'Sahaj Avastha' - A stage of unaffectedness or equipoise (perfect balance). Although a Sahajdhari may acquire the progressive steps in order to become a practicing Sikh, some people are still considered a Sahajdhari as they do not keep uncut kesh or hair or adopt the name, Singh, yet they can still follow the main beliefs of Sikhism.
There is a slight difference in people who are considered Sahadharis and hose who are Keshdharis. The main difference is Sahajdhari is one who follows the main beliefs of Sikhism, yet does not keep uncut hair or adopt the name Singh within their name, however Keshdharis, or normal Sikhs are those who do not cut their hair, and may follow the Five Ks and use the name Singh/Kaur, however they remain classified as a Keshdhari as they have not been baptised. This is considered the main difference. Source.
*BTW: Sikhs do not convert, they transform. Use of the term convert especially in relation to latter day Sikhs is inaccurate. One does not simply convert to or adopt another spiritual path. Those who choose Dharma, i.e., adherence to a righteous duty or path, which is fulfilled by the observance of custom or law with conformity and commitment to one's righteous duty and nature, as in Sikh Dharma, experience a true transition, a real transformation of consciousness.
Wahe Guru Ji Ka Khalsa! Wahe Guru Ji Ki Fateh! --
Read on.  Back To Beginning. 
My Sikh Sense
Fatehpal Singh Tarney
Gurdwara Watchdogs:
Janam Da Firangee, Sikhi Mai Mangee
April 17, 2018 --Through the years, from my experience as a youngster and in my informal conversations with non-Sikhs at interfaith gatherings, I have learned that all faiths have adherents who are too preoccupied with trivial details rather than authentic spirituality. There is often a fine line between important, visible symbols and adherence to one's faith, on the one hand, and superficiality on the other.
In my local sadh sangat, there are what I refer to as constant watchdogs, always on the lookout for real and imagined practices they consider undesirable. There is one fellow, for example, who reprimands elderly sardars who do not completely cover their hair and under-turbans with their dastars. Apparently, he has no appreciation of the fact that senior citizens may well be contending with vision impairments, nerve disorders, Parkinson disease symptoms, and other issues, and therefore may not be able tie their dastars as well as they did in their younger years. I always thought that respect for the elderly was a fundamental value.
I just had an experience with another watchdog who told me that I did not have my rehal (X-shaped foldable book-rest) in the proper place. I have a small prayer book stand on which I have a Nitnem and an English-Punjabi/Punjabi-English dictionary. Of course, I usually have this in front of me in the diwan hall, but when it is very crowded and when I prepare to stand for the ardaas, I place it to my side so that I neither interfere with myself nor anyone else.
This particular fellow chastised me and said that the rehal should always be in front of me. I wonder if he would have said anything to me were I perceived to be a Punjabi Sikh [tribalism] rather than a Westerner. I am sad to say that there are Punjabi Sikhs at my gurdwara in south Florida who still consider me an outsider [marginalized] despite my having been a Sikh for almost 40 years; having been a member of this sadh sangat for 30 years and having been only one of two Western Sikhs to have been presidents of predominantly Punjabi sadh sangats in North America.
Sikhi is not a race; nor an ethnicity; nor a nationality. True, a particular language and alphabet is central to our faith, but our faith consists of a set of universal principles that are meant to be lived by, not dogma or ritual.
We also have a person who is concerned with the position of people's feet relative to our Guru Granth Sahib. A lady at the age of 72, was re-positioning her legs and feet on the diwan floor, when this person who was in the line waiting to mattha-tek said something to her. He reprimanded her for pointing her feet at our Guru Granth Sahib when she was merely changing her body position.
Shouldn't this fellow have been focusing more on his obeisance to Guru Sahib than on the body adjustments of other devotees?
I am reminded here of the story of Guru Baba Nanak in Mecca. His feet, considered unclean, were facing the Kaaba and a mullah was offended and gathered a crowd in protest. Baba Nanak said, “Brothers, why are you so upset?” The mullah replied, “Because the sacred stone represents God and you don’t put your feet in the direction of God. That is bad!” Baba Nanak replied, “If you can tell me where God is NOT, I will gladly point my feet there.”
As I have written many times before, one of my heroes has been the late Khushwant Singh. I have the strong feeling that he would agree wholeheartedly with my opinions here. Sikhi should be about love, forgiveness and humility. What I often see in some amongst us is arrogance and intolerance. We Sikhs experience prejudice and discrimination on a regular basis. Shouldn't we simply focus on being kind and forgiving to each other?
I am reminded of something from an Urdu poem which in translation goes something like, “My face was dirty, but I was obsessed with cleaning the mirror! -- Source. Read on.
See SikhTribes.com. See 'My Sikh Sense' Regarding Nikki Haley. See Why There Are So Few Converts To Sikhism.
My Sikh Sense
Fatehpal Singh Tarney
Nimrata ‘Nikki’ Kaur Randhawa Haley: Trump 2.0
April 22, 2018 --I preface this column by stating that I am not a Nimrata ‘Nikki Kaur Randhawa Haley (widely known as ‘Nikki Haley‘) admirer. This should be apparent from the title I have given to this column. I contend that Nikki Haley has sold her soul to Donald Trump in the interest of her long-term political advantage – future higher office. [See Photos.]
To be fair, there are a few positions – a very few – that she has taken that I do approve of. She has, for example, been critical of the persecution of gay people in various parts of the world.
Nikki should also be commended for calling Russian meddling into the 2016 American election an act of “warfare.” Moreover, when Trump was criticized for ignoring the women who accused Republican Alabama Senate candidate Roy Moore of sexual assault, Nikki stated clearly that women who accuse men, including the President, of sexual misbehavior “should be heard.”
Trump was not always pleased with Nikki’s comments, but maintained – at least publicly – a good relationship with her, but complained about her privately.
Let us begin with Nikki Haley's ‘religion‘. Yes, she had two wedding ceremonies, a Sikh marriage ceremony and a Christian one. She is a Christian by her public proclamations in the recent years of her political career. She is a member in good standing of a Methodist church. According to our Rehat Maryada, a Sikh is a person who does not owe allegiance to any other religion. True, she remains proud of her Punjabi and Sikh heritage, which is a good thing, but she is not a Sikh. Her parents are devout Sikhs and her father wears a turban. (See Duality Optics: Why Sikh Women Don't Wear Turban.)
Nikki knew that she could not get very far in conservative Republican circles in South Carolina as a non-Christian. Only God and her conscience knows whether her conversion to Christianity was a meaningful one or one of political expedience. I am reminded of Henry of Navarre [Henry IV of France - King of France from 1589 to 1610 I.C.E.] who was baptized a Catholic, but raised a Protestant, but in order to be king of France had to renounce Protestantism and return to Catholicism. Henry was believed to have said: “Paris vaut bien une messe” - “Paris is well worth a mass!” Returning to Catholicism had enabled Henry to gain the loyalty of most Frenchmen.
In a way, history, repeated itself with Nikki Haley. She also endeared herself to Trump's daughter, Ivanka, which probably helped her get her cabinet position as UN ambassador.
In 1996, Nikki married Michael Haley, I reiterate, with both Sikh and Methodist ceremonies. By the way, my wife, who worships with me at our south Florida Gurdwara, is also a Methodist. Nikki claims to be a devout Christian, but attends both Sikh and Methodist services. In 2014, she and her husband made a pilgrimage to the Harmandar Sahib during a visit to Punjab.
During an interview with a Christian magazine, she was inappropriately asked if she hoped that her parents would convert to Christianity. She replied, "What I hope is that my parents do what's right for them." I would have preferred for her to have said something more fearless like, “Sikhs respect Christianity. Therefore, Christians should respect Sikhism!”
Nikki supported Marco Rubio - not Trump - in the Republican primaries prior to the 2016 presidential election. When Rubio dropped out, she then supported Ted Cruz. When Trump became the Republican candidate, she said that she would vote for Trump, but was "not a fan."
Her first speech as UN ambassador, taking a page out of Trump's book, emphasized American financial contributions, and referred to the UN not as the “UN,” but as the “US/UN” as if money was everything.
I have no trouble with Nikki's and Trump's support for Israel. What I have trouble with is their unqualified support for any and all Israel actions. There are Jewish resistance groups in Israel opposed to its right-wing government's policies. The Trump administration conveniently overlooks these Israeli opposition groups.
In July 2017, after The United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization [UNESCO] designated Hebron's Old City and the Cave of the Patriarchs as Palestinian territory and as endangered world heritage sites, Nikki called these decisions "tragic on several levels." This exemplified her and Trump's total bias against Palestinian interests at the cost of human decency.
In December 2017, Nikki warned UN members she would be “taking names” of countries that vote to reject Donald Trump’s recognition of Jerusalem as the capital of Israel. She wrote a letter saying that Trump and the United States would take such a vote very personally. In other words, agree with Trump or else! Nikki has even said that the UN has "bullied Israel for a very long time" and pledged that the US would end this unfair treatment.
Now, she is defending Trump's use of the term "Mission Accomplished" after the Syria raids despite the fact that we have no coherent, long-term strategy there, and have actually achieved little or nothing in the recent wave of much publicized bombings.
But she was clearly not on the same page as Trump when she recently announced new sanctions against Russia that Trump back-peddled on. She has been commended by some for snapping back and speaking out about her position when she was criticized by some of Trump's people ... as often happens in this tumultuous White House between members of the same administration.
Nikki Haley's political future is, of course, closely linked to Trump's floundering ship, so we shall see, won't we? -- Source.
Note
Sat Nam. Fetehpal Singh was president of Florida Gurdwara in 2000, a unanimous choice of two antagonistic factions. At the end, he was given a Siropa from the incoming committee in recognition of his reconciliation efforts. Read on.
See SikhTribes.com. See Gurdwara Watchdogs. See Why There Are So Few Converts To Sikhism. See Why Don't Sikh Women Tie Turban?
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